Posted in Anxiety, birthday, bullet journal, Dear Diary, jolly june, life, Poems, Quarantine Files, uni, UofT

eelam

the history of my people

runs in my veins

the stories of inhumane acts

run like a film roll in my head

the legacy of my family & tamils

keeps me going

everything I do is to honour

my blood

the history of tamils

sometimes keeps me up at night

2009 ,

haunts me

my appama and ammama missing in times of crisis

my uncle bombed to death

my aunt left widowed

how do they sleep at night

knowing they took the lives of

hundreds of thousand innocent lives

the war left

thousands of my people

displaced

killed

missing

murdered

sexually assaulted

kidnapped

dead

bombed

raped

how did they get away

with the numerous

war crimes

-XOXO chana

Posted in Anxiety, birthday, bullet journal, jolly june, life, Poems, Quarantine Files, uni, UofT

darkest days

even on my darkest

I still speak about you

with endearing terms

and spill my heart out

to anyone willing to listen

they say –

If he were the one

he would have ;

stayed

been present

consisten

they call you:

a wastebucket

a fuc boi

toxic

an ass

a cheat –

but I know

in my soul and with everyinch of my heart

the mistakes we were were pure and out of innocence

I need time to grow and bloosom

but I still have faith in

you & us

even when your actions and words tell me otherwise

I miss the old you – the real you

-XOXO chana

Posted in bullet journal, life

practicing the art of gratitude

Gratitude is an over looked concept. It is defined as ” the quality of being thankful”. it is the simple art of finding inner peace and ever lasting happiness. In lay mans terms, gratitude allows you to think and write down the things you are most grateful for in your life.

I don’t think I ever really practiced gratitude – until pretty much everything in my life turned to shit. At this point of time my anxiety was at its highest its ever been and I was grieving my cousin, Waldo’s, sudden death. I faced anxiety of the present and future. I was scared of everything that was to come in my life – because after all, everything can change in a blink of an eye. One minute everything can be fine and the next it could be utter chaos.

The aftermath of my cousins death left me losing faith. Everything changed, but for the worst. In order to mend my heart back together, I turned to the art of gratitude. Being a bullet journaller for a year at the time, I came across several collection spreads on gratitude logs – but before then, it never really resonated with me.

And so i set out to practice gratitude, in order to change my current outlook on life. I turned to pinterest to find inspiration for my gratitude log. Over time, I found that the easiest way to practice gratitude was to simply list a few things I was grateful for, on a daily basis.

NOTE: there are many other ways to practice gratitude, such as simply writing a word or line a day. or even just a simple list like I do 🙂

I would have to say that practicing gratitude has bettered both my life and mental health. More often than not, I find my self displaying a positive outlook on life. The art of gratitude has given me a new perspective or lens through which I view my life. Overall, I believe that practicing gratitude has allowed me to be more content with all I have in my life and not focus on what I don’t have.


would you consider practicing gratitude in your life ? what are your thoughts on the art of gratitude currently?

-XOXO chana

PS – linked is a pinterest board i have curated to help you set up a spread for practicing gratitude – whether it be in your journal, bullet journal or just a plain ol’ notebook 🙂

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